Head writing cheques that your body can't cash

...as my dad would say.

Gave myself a bit of a fright this morning. Yesterday was a very loooongg day and I pushed myself too hard. Managed to get to sleep last night even though away from home, but it was a creepy sleep full of nightsweats and stress dreams. Got woken this mornign by the phone and hubby with a question, managed to answer it before falling asleep again, felt like I was drugged...more nasty dreams and finally woke, if that is the right word as feel like crap, at quarter to 10.

You know, even if I had had a meeting, I don't think I could have gotten up. As I say, felt drugged.

Simple answer is that my body has just had enough and is refusing to cooperate with my crazy schedule. I have made steps to slow things down, but from the date that decision was made, there are still things I had already committed to do.

Please let me just get through the next two weeks and I can sleep for a month with no commitments!!!

O dear lovely Lowdown

I am thinking of you today and hoping you get through the next few weeks more easily than your expecting. And then have a lovely relaxing regenrating and rejuvenating rest!

Take Care Lovely Lowdown

Hugs

Monsta

when im feeling good i can handle everything that i take on, but i think im going down hill again, and everything is starting to mountain up on top of me. all of a sudden im tired, and have no real motivation. im feeling myself get worse but cant seem to stop it from happening

KandM, that's it exactly! Gotta learn to sit on my hands and not take things on when I am feeling good. Vicious cycle...

it is, but when i feel great i want to make up for the fact that ive done nothing for the last little while, and i feel i should be able to do the things i want to do and feel "normal" again, like i use to before getting ptsd.

Maybe its that we both need to redefine what 'normal' is for us...?

maybe we do Lowdown, for me thats hard because i remember when i was healthy, it was only 4yrs ago, and i know its not my fault and i lay all the blame on my very traumatic experence and the person who did it to me, but i sooooo want to be the person i was.
I was a great person who helped others, I had my head screwed on right, i was a productive member of society and people looked to me to get stuff done and be on committees and such.
I was proud of who i was. now im not too sure.
it is true about it all being a vicious cycle, i wish it would stop turning.

there seem to be a lot of us on here who were the ones that others relied on to do stuff...its very hard to redefine yourself when that is no longer an option.

I am working on my 'farewell to Superwoman' speech to exorcise the whole 'gotta keep the whole world turning' shit on my shoulders. Time to find a new way to live LOL

PS Kidsandme, you are not too far from me, if you ever feel like a coffee give a yell