LC's Update

Went and saw docs this morning, he's given me a painkiller/anti inflammatory for my back and a referral to a physio.

Gave him the note about how I've been feeling and he's given me a referral to a counselling service and has increased my meds from 150mg to 225mg.

Spoke to receptionist and this doctor is now the doctor I'm registered with at the practice rather than who I was with.

After picking up scripts came home and rang work, spoke to duty manager and said I wouldn't be in today (my choice) he asked what was wrong, well bloody hell I was basically in tears, was just straight up with him and said I couldn't handle it today and couldn't face it. He asked if I'd seen anyone, and told him I'd been at docs this morning. I seem to recall telling him I couldn't do it any more as well *sigh* oh well, I really can't face work today, I know it means it will be more of a mess for me to sort out tomorrow, but I can't handle it today. Least he was good about it and told me to try look after myself.

Gonna text a mate and see if she can come around this arvo for a bit maybe.

good for you LC, youv'e done well with progress. At least you have some action (although personally I haven't had alot of progress myself with physio's).

And good for you for not going into work too, you need a rest.

Congrats for having the courage to do everything you did this morning, hon and and I hope the pain fades away fast for you; and that you use today to snooze and be gentle with you.

I'll see what I can sort out to keep my end of our wee barain. Damn.

Don't worry about work, I'm quite sure that if you need a Note from ya doc, he will provide it. Cor, ya did it, changed doctors 'n all. I'd better do my bit now eh?

You take really super good care of you, Lisa. You are a lot stronger and more courageous than you relise, I think.

Well done.

Thanks guys, I really couldn't have done it without all your support and everyone else here. I've rung the counsellor, and am waiting for her to ring me back to see how much it's gonna cost me. Doc thinks that as most of this is caused further by the accident ACC may cover a small part of the cost.

I just feel so worn out now and fragile. In the state I'm feeling there is no way I'd make it through 7hrs of work.

let me know how you get on ok?

You can do it Paddy. So can you Mylife.

Hi LC, glad you spoke to your doc, sounds as if he is going to try and get things moving for you. Good for you taking the day off but PLEASE don't spend it worrying about not being at work as that is fairly counterproductive. I am not working just now but know that in the past, when I have taken a day off for what others may consider 'not good reason' I've spent a good deal of the time beating myself up about taking the day off instead of using the time to relax and pamper myself. What have you done today just for you that makes you feel pampered????

Nar BB, I'm not worrying about not being at work, at first was a bit embarrassed by what I said to the Duty Manager, but got over that and figured he can take it whatever way he likes, and if he (or the other managers tomorrow) ask me about it, well I think it's about time I was a bit more honest and open with them, so will tell them as much as I feel comfortable with.

I've managed to tidy up the place today, got a mate coming round with ice cream tonight, and until then just gonna rest.

Good for you. What flavour icecream? My current flavour is chocolate flavoured cookies and cream. Very yummy. Since I've felt down I've discovered the delights of sugar. In the past I've been more inclined towards savoury things.

11am tomorrow morning, first counselling appointment Means I'll be at work for about 50mins then have to go, lol. Might ring manager first thing though and ask if I can start at 9am to make up for the missing hour. Will see how I feel.

Well done LC and I hope all goes well for you tomorrow. You can be so proud of yourself. HUgs

Thanks, I feel so nervous, and sick (though I think that's from the meds)

I have enough trouble taking any sort of pills as it is, but to have to force myself to take these two capsules (and one's like twice the size of a normal one) and know that I'll feel sick for the rest of the day is very hard!! I hate it.

hey LC, hope it all goes ok today for you,

It went ok for me yesterday, just started to spin out last night....

Hi LC, please let us know how the counselling goes. As for your meds, press on for a few days but if they are really disagreeing with you, phone your doc. Not all meds work for same for everyone, it may be you need another change.

how did your councilling go today???

BB I've been on these meds before, and know they work, they'd be alright I think if I could get something to counteract and get rid of the nausea and headaches. That is why I came off them the last time.

The duty manager that I spoke to yesterday was in working this morning briefly, he came and spoke to me before he went home and asked if I was feeling any better, told him straight up no I wasn't and then said I had the counselling appointment. He was nice and told me just to take it easy and to speak to Rob (the other duty manager) if I needed help with anything.

The counselling appointment, well the lady seems nice enough. She asks bloody questions though!! I was kinda hoping you know maybe she wouldn't need me to say anything *sigh* Yea right!! Brought up a few things, bout the accident, my ex and how I felt about my parents selling and building. See her again in two weeks.

She reckons at the moment I'm suffering from post traumatic stress disorder after the crash, and says that since I suffer depression anyway I am a high risk for getting it and it's not that surprising.

I'm worn out though, I'm not focused, I'm not fully aware of things, I'm kinda zoned out really. Thinking it's from the meds. It was cold today, I work in a chiller and freezer, I KNEW it was cold, I felt cold, my mind was telling me I was cold and needed to take my jacket off So I've pretty much spent all day being cold because I couldn't keep my jacket on because I was cold. Man, try figure that one out coz I can't. I'll be in the middle of doing a job and then just stop, coz I've completely forgotten what I'm doing. Didn't think I'd make it through working all day at work, but somehow I managed.

Man this is hard, trying to get through each day. Two more days of work left, can't wait, getting through the first 3-4 hours is manageable, it's the last 7-8 hours that I struggle with.

i bet that is a struggle!

Take it away!! Take it all away, I've had enough of feeling like this I know, it can take time to settle to the higher dosage. My appetite had gone down a few weeks ago, now it's basically nothing, am forcing myself to eat though in the hopes that maybe it might lesson some of the sickness feeling.

now that you dont have to work,
the music you can use
to sail you away to self healing
and bettering yourself.
Its important
we care for ourselves first
before serving others.
Love

When I don't feel hungry I made a shake out of a banana, one or two weetbix, honey a raw egg and whatever flavour, sometimes vanilla sometimes some drinking chocolate or sometimes frozen berries if I have some in the freezer. The weetbix thickens it so it doesn't all separate if you don't drink it all and also gives extra food value. It is delicious, easy peasy to make, keeps you going and then you don't have to worry about not eating too much for the day if you don't fancy it. I am quite skinny so need to be sure to keep calories up even when I have no appetite.

GM not sure where you got the idea that I wasn't working from?? I'm still in full-time work, trying to get through each day.

BB yea had thought of making a smoothie, don't have the energy to make one though, or make anything. *sigh* gonna try a toasted sandwich soon.

That is a good idea. A ham, tomatoe and onion toastie sounds so good. I have a lamb and mushroom stew I made yesterday and am planning to make dumplings to go in it when i get round to it. Unlike you, I can do it anytime as I am not working. Dinner may be around 10pm tonight for me. That no energy thing is not a nice feeling, wish I could make it go away for you. Imagine me waving my magic wand over your head, it may not make you feel better but such a ridiculous sight may put a brief smile on your face.

hmmm will either be cheese, ham and pineapple, or egg, cheese and ham, or maybe just cheese. Gotta get up and do it first.