Hi all - I'm new here. Just wanting some feedback really-

A close friend of mine tried to commit suicide a couple of days ago. They've had help from the psych people, GP, meds and counselling. I've phoned them (as has my husband) to offer our support and love. I feel so helpless though, what else can I do to help them? I don't want them to think it is just a superficial offer of help but I also don't want to barge in and make things worse either.... I've been to the place they're in and it's very dark and I'm scared that they will try it again.

my heart goes out to your friend, it wasnt too long ago that i tried the same thing, I cant really offer any advice sorry, and it sounds like all the right things have been done so far, and its really wonderful that you are so supportive, i guess just keep being supportive in any way that you can, just as you are now, it sounds like you are a great friend.

There really isn't to much you can do I think. I am trying to think of all of the things my husband has done for me over the past few months and my reactions.

Just be a good friend, don't judge, and be there for them. Call in and make sure they are ok, phone them but try not to smoother. Just be supportive. Tell them they are important to you (even that you love them as friend too - that helps). They need to know how upset and lost you would feel if they were successful.

They may need some hand holding and perhaps a little firmness at times and they may be angry at the world and you and themselves and lash out - I know in my case really bad swearing and anger tension have come to the floor - I even told my husband I hated him (rather I shouted it) and to f*** off in an effort to make sure he wasn't close to me. Be strong.

Percevere, it will be challenging - but rewarding when they come out the other side, maybe more so for you than for them in the short term.

I hope that made sense!

Hi Samster, what a careing freind you are. Sounds to me something that you could do is to do something for the freinds partner. Sometimes the partner gets forgotten and he/ she will be going through a very tough time themselves, so what about cooking a meal, or maybe offering to sit/visit freind so partner can have some time out. Hugs to you and your freinds

Yes the partners need support too! Something mine doesn't have ...because no one else knows..

Its kinda the same for my partner too mylife, he doesnt have anyone else to talk too, i would direct him here but hes not really a mb kind of person.

Offering to help look after kids if your friend has any sounds like a great suggestion, or maybe to help around the house, i know from my point of view id love that support.

just be there talk about other things normal life things. I remember sitting there think about what people were thinkinh about me after i tried to end it all. just be strong

I agree with what everyone else has said...and I just want to add a thought...as this is something that has helped me personally since coming here

always be straightup and honest with your friend about their depression and their suicide attempt...don't gloss over it or try to act like these things are not a huge part of your friends life right now...as I know for myself that this kind of behaviour from others left me feeling more isolated and like no-one else really gave a shit...and like I was just something that they had to endure to be able to get on with their day...I don't mean for you to hound your friend on the topic just to be very frank about it and your feelings when ever it does pop up

hope you get the gist of that...be kind to yourself

hear hear, be kind to yourself

This is awesome. I went round there this morning with some baking on my way to work. Didn't know what to do or say so told them that, and told them that I'm glad they are still here. I guess the thing is that people don't know how to act or if they are saying / doing the 'right thing' whatever that is...... you're frightened that you might cause something because you've said something thoughtless (which I can do on occasion lol). So hard to know what to do. I hope they realise that we're there for them and not just saying the right thing and meaning nothing at all. I've never told anyone about my issues with depression in the past because I wanted to save face and keep up the image - fat lot of good that did me! Just glad they have taken steps to get help now. Thanks again for your thoughts guys, I really appreciate it - this has affected me a lot more than I realised.

hi Samster

Wow what an awesome friend you are and i guess that is all you can keep doing its a good thing for your friend to know that you are not judging them and just being supportive , and its awesome of you to be on here seeking advice i am new to depression but i hope someone with more knowledge can help you