well life...

Pretty much sucks.
I feel so angry and sad inside, but nothing shows on the outside.
I feel so sick and truly so trapped. It feels like I want to cry, but I just can't.

I wish people didn't care about me so I could just run far away.

Sorry,


I just don't understand. I'm sick of this place, I really am.

hugs honey, people care about you, a very good reason to stick around. Tomorrow, will get a little better.

Hello Qwerky I am sorry that you are going through emotional hell at the moment. I hope that tomorrow is a better day for you. Hang in there.

qwerky,

I did formulate a reply to this yesterday but my computer kept cutting out.

i want you to realise a few things - if you would please -

1. Personally I care for you and that won't change. Jono does too an so does samiam - and your family. This won't change so you have to live with that.

2. Feeling angry, sad, confused, trapped are all normal reactions to depression - i feel like that too - it is just part in parcel of this illness. You may need to go back to that doctor of yours - tell them how you feel re the councilling (i don't think you feel you got the 'best' out of it) and be brutally honest about how you feel.

3. Running away from this and everything else will not solve the problem. Unfort the depression will not go away if you do run away as it is with you 24/7 at the moment.

4. You need more help - go and get it please. It was delightful to have qwerky here, happy and cheeky. That is the real qwerky.

Remember alot of us here love you the way you are, as does Jono. Try not to hold back in getting better.

I feel so weird.
Hopefully the weekend will be enough to help

i hope so qwerky

Another week at work. I don't know how people do it. I just don't know, for how many years???

It doesn't seem worth it

Why do I bother trying to help people. No one ever listens to me. No one wants to know me when I try help. I'm no use to this place. All I have wanted to do is help, is to do things for other people. But no one cares, no one really cares.

It doesn't matter anymore. I can't be arsed anymore.
The one thing I thought I was ok at, but wow, another thing to tell me I suck.

The only people I know are/ or have been depressed. I have no other friends, and finding out someone else I was close to years ago was going to try kill herself just destroys me. I can't do it. Why does thi world tourture people??!! It's not fair. This life isn't fair!!

It's STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Did anyone else think it was Sunday today *sigh*

Morning qwerky, gosh I wish is was Sunday, then I could have another day off, lol.
It was lovely to see your post last evening, letting us know you had a great time with your boyfreind and gardening over the weekend. I find gardening very relaxing.
Hope today is good to you, we all care about you very much hun.

hey qwerky

Love the photo!

Yes I would love to stay in bed - if it was sunday again!

Yes there does seem to be alot of depression about now a days - perhaps it is more 'accepted' than it was a number of years ago and that is why we are hearing more of it.

by the way, I listen, and you are useful to this place.

stop putting your self down there is no need to.

I hope today is ok for you - although it is monday - it should go quickly.

I'll check to see how you are doing later

I'm a screw up. I can see people are getting annoyed with me because I keep doing the wrong thing today.
I want today to be over.

This life is not worth it. I'll be useless like I am right now. I'm an annoying person!

Hey Qwerky,

Give it about 12 hours and today will be over, Tommorrow will be better.