Why do i find myself here

Once More?

I wish it wasn't the way, but wham! here I am again, on my own, no job, no prospects, no life

Dear Mylife

I know its awful to find oneself back in the trench feeling overwhelmed again.

Poor You,

Mylife look up these folks there is a branch in Auckland its called the Grow Group

They are doing wonders down here, mylife you have to take the help on offer because you cannot do this depression thing on yer own.

Love Martinexx

Oh Mylife, how did you end up without a job? You were so happy about becoming a part of a larger company and ditching some of the responsbility. You have a computer and a good brain, could you get a couple of clients and work from home for a bit? Just to keep your hand in so to speak and a little extra cash for you and the family.

I disagree that you can't do depression or anything else on your own, everyone has their own way of coping. Some of us need to join lots of groups and think that is the way forward for all of us. Before jumping into any groups may be best to check them out and make sure they have similar philosophies and values to you own as, if you end up with the wrong group, in my opinion, it could do a lot more harm than good. Remember YOUR judgement about your situation and your coping abilties are what count not anyone elses.

mylife wrote:Once More?

I wish it wasn't the way, but wham! here I am again, on my own, no job, no prospects, no life

yes, it is the way it seems,
we get alittle together
and then whammo, its lost again. But no-LIFE isnt the case. You are alive. You have feelings, not neccessarilly elated feelings but you have feeling. Thus, we gain another chance to see how well we can cope without
having any security in life.

When we look at all Life; where is security?
There isnt any. All life is precarious and in suffering.
We must look towards finding another station in life from which to Live from.


One thing Ive noticed in Life mylife,
is that when the thought arises that 'this is it', 'I have it together', then Life undose right afterwards.
Its as though we shouldnt take a look, but we do. Curiosity seems to kill the cat!

All I can say, is , carry-on mylife as you are making ground.
Take a moment to stocktake by writing down all the good things on one side of the page and the not so good things on the other.
You will notice that alot of wonderful things have happened to you and its really a moment to try and balance out your mind, you lot in life.

Go for a stiff run and get a sweat-up and then flop-down and do some meditation.
This will put all your energy in motion and permit you an easier meditation than what you think.

Invigorate your Body-mind then allow nature to settle and balance this unfortunate thing that has happened.
Failing being able to do this,
Run a Hot bath and throw some herbs into the water, light a candel or two and lay back in the water and allow the herbs to sooth you and go about their aeromattic business within your mind.

Thanks guys,

I have since found out the ex employee that I managed to bring across - fully employed- to the new firm has been writing to clients (annoymously) saying all these nasty things - like I don't know what I am doing, not to go with me, not to talk to me etc. Evidently according to these letters I am the worst accountant in the world and don't deserve to work where I did.

I have sent the letter to my solicitor - she made the mistake of sending one to a client who is also a personal friend of mine. I was talking to her *my friend* last night on the phone when she said, hang on we got this letter 6 weeks ago and didn't know what to do with it.


I was dismissed because of something my ex employee said to my new employer. My solicitor and I are going for a constructive dismissal over it as they had no reason to push me to walk the plank - so to speak.

I am angry, upset and now severelly depressed. I am off to the doctor today - after being off meds for the last 8 months I fear I will need to go back on them. Until now vitamin B really helped. Will see what the doc says.

Let us know how you get on with the doc Mylife.

My Life...
seems like your 'depth of vision' and see-ing what is,
is what is being developed at this moment in your life.
"found out the ex employee that I managed to bring across "

Stay off the drugs and express your feelings fully is my suggestion.
Work out this that brings your blindness to ppl; take on a paychotherapist if you have the money saved for a special occasion; this is it.

Sending you full-support for your rapid healing.
love

Mylife that is terrible that you have been used in this way by someone you stood by.

I am so sorry this has happened to you and I hope the person who slandered you rots somewhere.

Mylife get back up again and get better in spite of them and you and your lawyer go get them.

Love to you
Martine

Martine wrote:I hope the person who slandered you rots somewhere.
Martine

what of this love you mention?

Lol Alfio the love was sent to mylife if you read the post.

Martinex

"I hope the person who slandered you rots somewhere!"

when we hate someone we dont know
where dose our love go?

hi Mylife, how are you? thinking of you.

Paddy....
what do i do in this instance?

Hi all,

Sorry I haven't replied, I am away for this 2nd week of the school holidays. Time to reflect and trying to relax which is very hard to do.

Am here with a past member (samiam) and her new man and his two boys. Between them all (Inc my husband and two boys) I am getting to keep busy..

Thanks guys, I'll check in next week

trying to relax,
we must understand that the "trying" bit
is what makes our best efforts NOT-Work as well as it would
if we used TENSION as the major-means
of creating RELAXATION.

I used to work in this field myLife.

It became my-job after i healed myself from a rough-marriage ride
where my wife was having sex with our Minister of Religion.
As you can imagine,
this caused alot of tension on my inside
as i wasnt at all skilled at expressing my feelings as i am Now.
That was many years ago.

Learning to relax,
we must first open our minds to receiving.
This one can do if the person offering advice has some music playing in the back ground, as we listen or read what is being said, or the written-word, as is in your case now.
Taking things in is IMPOSSIBLE if we are full of tension.

To make-space so that we can RELAX,
we need to use alot of energy to create further tension
and hold that tension along with a full lung of air for as long as we can keep it inside; then sighhhh it all out.

When the last drop of air is exhaled
beguin to breath-in again, focussing as deep down in your gut as you can, and closely watching as you fill from the bottom-upwards and then hold it in and create as much physical-tension as you can within your Body.
Hold this tension for as long as you can
and then release the tension and the breath and sigh out of your pursed lips,
so that you can feel the effects it has on you,
ALL THE WAY-OUT!

You may need a break, to breath easy between these strenuous efforts,
to regain your equalibrium, so take your time to BE THE JUDGE of your own situation,
and start again as soon as you're ready.

If you're only tense in one AREA of your BODY
(some ppl are very-sensitive and aware of where their tensions are stored)
then you should only focus your-tensioning into that part of your Body-Mind.

Like if you only have fascial-tension
(that which one gets from 'keeping a straight face' and blocking-others from seeing
any sign of life happening in you)
you then only need to screw-up the face
and hold it tight for as long as you can hold your breath,
and then sigh through your pursed lips.

So, the ART of relaxing is tensioning/holding/letting go slowly!

If the tension you feel is in your gut,
then drawing the knees up and curling the head down
will help focus your mind into the gut-zone....


This workz
when you make time for yourself.

Alfio - nothing, is what you have to do. Just post without making any reference to it - work around it, so to speak.

And I'd appreciate you using PM's to me rather than a comment that to others would (should) be cryptic. Just like my post now will be, hopefully.

ML - Sorry for hijacking your Thread for a moment.

How are you doing, hon? Are you managing 'stuff' or not really sometimes? How are you using your days? Sticking Pins in named Dolls is good, especially if you have a piece of the persons hair or some such.

You take extra special gentle care of you please. Ta,

Paddy.

Paddy wrote:Alfio - nothing, is what you have to do. Just post without making any reference to it - work around it, so to speak.

And I'd appreciate you using PM's to me rather than a comment that to others would (should) be cryptic. Just like my post now will be, hopefully.

ML - Sorry for hijacking your Thread for a moment.

How are you doing, hon? Are you managing 'stuff' or not really sometimes? How are you using your days? Sticking Pins in named Dolls is good, especially if you have a piece of the persons hair or some such.

You take extra special gentle care of you please. Ta,

Paddy.

never used a pm...yet!
I like things to be wide open
so that everyone can have a say!

I am really not doing well. last night the roads were wet and slippery on the way home from work. Although I wanted to smash into a pole more than hard enough, every time the opportunity came along there were too many cars around.

But one day I will have my way..............................................

Hi Mylife

Sorry to hear your not doing well at the moment, sounds like a lot of stress has triggered off this low.

I don't know where you are at with support, but do you think a Dr visit could be a start?. One step again Mylife, you can do this, know the black dog will leave, and you will come up to surface again.

Recently I had to take a step again too. It is blinkin tough going, know your thought of mylife and admired for the BIG steps you have taken with your job; and the big steps of coming on here and sharing how your going.

Take care MF