DO PEOPLE NOT UNDERSTAND!!!!!???!!!

Woppow I know you said please don't waste your time replying....

But I have to...... I am so truly sorry for you loss and proud of you too for giving voice to her life and what she means to you. She has a beautiful name and surname. Please try to let go of the blame... because you are not to blame Woppow - You were her beautiful friend!!!

I wish i had a magic wand to make you feel better, just know that I/We care about you. "I want to make good times" you will hun... hold on to the 'outdoor' course you are going to do. Keep making happy memories as hard as it is........

Arohanui (biglove)
poetry

oh wop, I don't know what to say.

And you know that I always read what is on here, esp your posts. I wonder if a grief councoller (ex sp) would help.

Do people not understand when they take their lives they take others too!

You've hit the nail on the heat right here. Every time I get so low that I start thinking about suicide, "noone will care" is one of the most prominent thoughts that goes through my mind. Please dont think of her as selfish. Think of them as having been very, very troubled.

If I was a better friend I wouldnt be sitting here in tears at just the bare thought of the 14 year old who I helped kill.

Woah Woah Woah Wop. There is a huge difference between helping kill someone, and preventing them from hurting themselves. YOU DID NOT help kill her. Could you have done more? Maybe. I'm sure if you had a time machine you would go back and do things differently. I'm 100% positive though, that you have learned from this tragedy. I guarantee you, the next time you see a friend who is struggling you will be there for them and you will be the the best friend you can be. We can't change the past, unfortunately, but we can learn from it.

It's great that you remember your friend, and think of her so fondly. I'm pretty sure, she would not want to see you carrying this burden of guilt.
Thats all I can muster for now. I hope it helps.

JK

I couldn't have said it better Jaffa,

Man I hate it when I am lost for words...it doesn't happen often!

(((BIG HUGS))) geez woppow,im sorry you lost your dear friend...i to, have lost people due to suicide and it leaves so many unanswered questions and so many what ifs?. please DO NOT blame yourself,this was a decision she made.

your grieving and you have every right to do so. in saying that there are 5 steps to the grief process,im not very good at explaining things (lol) so i have copy and pasted it from a website (am i allowed to do that??)

1-Denial-"this can't be happening to me", looking for the former spouse in familia places, or if it is death, setting the table for the person or acting as if they are still in living there. No crying. Not accepting or even acknowledging the loss.

2-Anger-"why me?", feelings of wanting to fight back or get even with spouse of divorce, for death, anger at the deceased, blaming them for leaving.

3-Bargaining-bargaining often takes place before the loss. Attempting to make deals with the spouse who is leaving, or attempting to make deals with God to stop or change the loss. Begging, wishing, praying for them to come back.

4-Depression-overwhelming feelings of hopelessness, frustration, bitterness, self pity, mourning loss of person as well as the hopes, dreams and plans for the future. Feeling lack of control, feeling numb. Perhaps feeling suicidal.

5-Acceptance-there is a difference between resignation and acceptance. You have to accept the loss, not just try to bear it quietly. Realization that it takes two to make or break a marriage. Realization that the person is gone (in death) that it is not their fault, they didn't leave you on purpose. (even in cases of suicide, often the deceased person, was not in their right frame of mind) Finding the good that can come out of the pain of loss, finding comfort and healing. Our goals turn toward personal growth. Stay with fond memories of person.

hey wop haven't heard fromyou for a while..how's things

Not good.

but I am meeting my CSW tomorrow so yeah see what comes out of that.

good luck then, your a great young lady -
keep us posted ay?

Thinking of you woppow (((Hugs))))
Was awesome chatting to you, you have a wonderful sense of humour....so many giggles. Take care

Poetry

hey woppow - how did you get on?

keep in touch wop when you are out?