Flatmates grrrr!!

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Flatmates grrrr!!

Post by lil_miss_haley on Mon Mar 30, 2009 1:49 am

I am so over my flatmates. They have their family coming over all the time whenever they want, and not even when they are there. They use the internet, ph, washing machine and kitchen and Im over it. They even had their mother come and stay the other weekend and didnt mention it to us, we found out by reading a note to her on the whiteboard upstairs. That was the last straw for me and I said something to them.

I mean fair enough they own the place, semi understandable having family over, but for them to come over once, twice or more a week, every week, to use all our shit? Im not cool with that. Me and bf pay half, not exactly fair when half is not our half.

So we arnt happy, why dont we look for a new place? We are!!! We have been looking for about 2 or more months, but there is nothing we can find that we like or can afford. We don't want to 'settle' for something this time to be in this position in another couple of months.

Sometimes I feel like Im a stranger in my own home. I feel bad doing certain things like using the kitchen. We are expected to clean up our mess all the time, when they leave mess for days. Their dog shits everywhere and it smells really bad and we get flies in our room cos we are downstairs. Can barely get to the washing line because of it.

Now we have to have a 'talk' with them tonight, except its just me because bf is at work till late. FFS I just can't be bothered. I have an assignment to do tonight I just want to come home and go to bed. Im staying late at work as it is to do the bloody assignment cos I wont do it at home cos Im just so tired. Im trying to be healthy, but I dont want to go upstairs and have a 'little chat' where we will be told off about something else, then have to use the kitchen. And now all I feel like is comfort food, having a snack of chocolate, or grabbing some wendys on my way home. Shit like this pulls back up my anxity and Iv had enough of that after stressing about the party last week.

Fuck I just want a hug and a big cry
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lil_miss_haley

Number of posts : 416
Age : 29
Location : Auckland
Registration date : 2008-10-14

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Re: Flatmates grrrr!!

Post by Guest on Mon Mar 30, 2009 2:11 am

(hugs)

Flatting can be very hard and stressful at times.

Stay strong girl

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Re: Flatmates grrrr!!

Post by jomatt on Mon Mar 30, 2009 11:18 pm

Aaaaaw Miss, (big hugs for you) so sorry to hear about your situation. I can only suggest that you tell your flatmates that you will be happy to sit down and have a chat with them, BUT when your partner is there as well. I think that is only fair Miss, otherwise it seems like it's 'them against you' so just even up the playing field and make a time when its convenient for everyone. Hang in there kid. Wink
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jomatt

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Re: Flatmates grrrr!!

Post by lil_miss_haley on Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:52 am

Thank you guys (jo I miss our chats!!)

I spoke to them last night, got it over and done with. It was nothing real big, just stupid stuff that was more bfs fault and I told him. It was little things that really didnt matter or was their dogs fault which was stupid.

However last night when I was trying to sleep I went up and told them to keep it down. Im sick of hearing them have the tv really loud and have her shrieking all bloody night.. I mean we dont need to hear them play fighting etc, we keep our voices down and stuff at night, you would think that they would have the same consideration.

They are pretty dumb though, both of them are very close to being made redundant and they will need flatmates. But they won't be having flatmates stay very long with the way they act atm!
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lil_miss_haley

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Re: Flatmates grrrr!!

Post by claire_sky on Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:22 am

HI Haley, i hate confrontation too, and the thought of having little flat chats can give me a stomach ulcer! IM a considerate person, never have the TV too loud or careful how heavy i walk around at night so not to disturn anyone else in the house so it seems natural to me too that everyone wuold have this same consideration! But sadly thats not the case - some people are dumb as you put it! Hang in there and do stand up for your self! You shouldnt feel like a visitor in your own home!

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Re: Flatmates grrrr!!

Post by Guest on Thu May 07, 2009 6:31 am

I think everyone hates confrontation.. stand up for yourself tho!

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Re: Flatmates grrrr!!

Post by lil_miss_haley on Thu May 07, 2009 7:04 am

We are out of there now, have moved into a place of our own. I thought I would feel stressed out moving, but I actually feel better knowing that I can come home to a place without people I cant really stand. I can do what ever, when ever, and I dont have to deal with them. I can hang out in the lounge instead of living in my bedroom. I can cook and clean whenever I want without wondering what theyre doing.

Now another vent that I need to get out without starting another thread... Bf again!! We been looking for a tv cos my 14" just isnt doing it for us anymore. So hes been looking on trademe and bidding on tvs. The idiot bidded on a tv today and won it. I was pissed off cos it was more than I wanted to spend on a tv smaller than I really wanted. So of course IM the one that had to email the trader and apologies profusly and IM the one that gets the bad feedback and told that Im unprofessional. FFS I just hate stuff like that I hate being critisised even though its not my fault, its bfs, it just makes me look stupid... Im so f'ed off with him atm
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lil_miss_haley

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Age : 29
Location : Auckland
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Re: Flatmates grrrr!!

Post by Guest on Thu May 07, 2009 7:54 am

A recurring problem with people who are depressed I think is that they lack the ability to be assertive. Perhaps you should let your bf know it is unacceptable for him to use your trade me account.

We are all responsible for our trade me accounts. We have an obligation to keep our passwords to ourselves. Maybe have it so it doesn't always log in. We all have an ability to prevent these things from happening.

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Re: Flatmates grrrr!!

Post by Guest on Thu May 07, 2009 8:37 am

Haley - he should have consulted you. esp if you are sharing funds etc..

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