This has not been a very good year

Starting at start of the year my friend and flatmate lost her job, I put the pressure onto myself, ended up taking and OD then went down to New Plymouth with family for 3 months. Time down there was alright but not much was achieved, came back earlier than planned and started back at work. Mood and that kept slipping, end of May had a manic episode which resulted in losing my job. Moved into a flat with couple of friends and things were alright for a while.

Last 4 months have been a mix of emotions and mood being up and down still but medication working and keeping me stable. Three weeks ago had first major argument in flat with other female flatmate saying she was gonna move out, she then ended up in hospital but did come back. Last week while I was on holiday she informed male flatmate that she was leaving and proceeded to pack up and go back to her parents. Yesterday he wanted me to choose between him or her and her family (who are like family to me), I picked them he was not happy.

I ended up in respite care for the Wednesday night, came home yesterday and me and him sorted some things out. Hasn't risen my mood though, that's just slipping more and more. Really hope next year is better.

I agree. This year has been disastrous for me as well. On the bright side I finally sought help and hopefully things will be better next year.

Yeah flatting sucks. We had problems with our ex-flatmate's friends turning up at random times and generally being a nuisance. When she finally left, we decided to not have any extra flatmates. While I'm now much poorer, I have one less thing to stress me out.

Yea the 3 of us are great friends too so we trying to work it out so we can stay friends.

I've found a feeling of safety in a couple of my jackets with hoods. It's kinda hot but don't wanna take my jacket off. May sound stupid really.

I am with you on that, back on meds for the first time in 10 years, just proves the black dog is still around. On Cipramil, but they haven't kicked in yet. Just got to hang in there really, so many people would be disappointed if they new, funny thing is, I work with mental health clinicians and the only one to pick it up was an admin person. so much for their assessment skills.

Having a holidy next week, perhaps that will help but who knows.

Just come out of 3 days in respite care. Back to doc soon so see what she says.

can anyone have respite care.. sometimes I just want to hide from the world and "respite" sounds like bliss...

Respite: a (temporary) relief from harm or discomfort


xoxo
hugs Poetry

Hi Logical how are ya dear?

Write all this bad shit down on a piece of paper, put it in an envelope and make a wee fire in your back garden.

The past is another country and they do things differently there. This saying has been holding me up for a while.

Love to you
Martine

hey lc, just wondering how your doing tonight.

sorry I haven't been in touch with you. I hope next year is better too because this one has been shit for all of us I think!

The only way is up don't you agree?

Still haven't been too good. Doc said it's just because of the situation at the moment. About to give up.

Dear Logical

You have coped with worse than this and come through OK.

Go back to the Dr and get some prn if you need for a while, aren't people destructive sometimes?

Just when we think we're doing OK some bugger rains on our little parades and fucks us over again.

Do you have to share or could you get your own wee place??

I could probably get my own place, but I need the support of my mates or I end up doing things like not taking my meds, and more self harm, plus I like the company and I'm learning to be more open about how I'm feeling. Not sure if I'd like to go back to being on my own.

Martine wrote:

The past is another country and they do things differently there. This saying has been holding me up for a while.

I really like that saying. Thanks Martine.