http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/-t1.htm Thu, 12 Nov 2009 01:46:24 GMT 10 http://illiweb.com/fa/prosilver/site_logo.gif http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/-t1.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/i-live-in-my-own-little-worldbut-it-s-okay-they-know-me-here-t1227.htm Garfield Hello World it's me........again. well today has not been to bad, except for the lack of sleep last night from worrie about my job having to go to the doctors to get a letter to take to said job to inform them that I have....uuuuuh deep breath ....wait for it.......a mental illness ..yes folks...surprise suprise ....for some people.... anyhoo was just asking for my hours to be cut back from 6-11pm to 6-10pm as I am finding it hard to cope with 11pm finsihes. I basically got what I ... My Journal Thu, 12 Nov 2009 01:46:24 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/i-live-in-my-own-little-worldbut-it-s-okay-they-know-me-here-t1227.htm#11100 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/i-live-in-my-own-little-worldbut-it-s-okay-they-know-me-here-t1227.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/jk-my-space-t718.htm Anonymous Not many of you know, but most of the time I am on TBBD - I am lying in my bed, my laptop on my tummy and my neck propped up on 3 or 4 pillows. This is undoubtedly a terrible posture and the reason my back gets so sore. So why do I do it? It is my safe place. I often just feel so overwhelmed with my life that all I want to do is go home, pull the curtains, lock the door, and pull my laptop out. From here, I have direct control over what I see, who I talk to, and what I think about. ... My Journal Wed, 20 May 2009 23:54:34 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/jk-my-space-t718.htm#5360 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/jk-my-space-t718.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/i-m-taking-it-day-by-day-t848.htm Anonymous Well I think I should start this journal off on a good note- My partner and I have brought a new kitten. His name is Felix and he is about 9 weeks old. Unfortunately my partner and I don't live together (we're still a bit young), so Felix lives at their house. Having something to look after has made life more worth living. As my friend said, Felix will give me something to focus on, instead of living day to day having nothing really in my life. My Journal Tue, 23 Jun 2009 22:21:39 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/i-m-taking-it-day-by-day-t848.htm#7014 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/i-m-taking-it-day-by-day-t848.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/once-upon-a-time-t863.htm mylife Once upon a time there was a little girl. She lived with her parents, an older sister (by 8 and a half years), and an older brother (by about 7 years) behind a dairy in the the heart of Auckland city. Not quite 5 this little girl was due to start school and was very excited. She did not have any friends outside her family and was keen to make some. Each day she would take her tea set to the back yard, with some smarties and water and try and imagine what school was like. She would write ... My Journal Sat, 27 Jun 2009 22:08:30 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/once-upon-a-time-t863.htm#7197 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/once-upon-a-time-t863.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/haleys-journal-a-whole-lot-of-random-thoughts-and-outbursts-t732.htm lil_miss_haley Its great to have a little area I can put my name on and use it as my venting/whining/happy stuff thread. Currently Im in Hamilton on course. I should be doing assignments, but will do them after I get this out. Im in bed, having a glass of red and a peice of dark choc. I did a very bad thing last night. So bad Im not even going to say what I did. But god it was a horrible thing and I regret it and feel so horrible and bad and just.. gross. I want to get it out, but I can't. I ... My Journal Tue, 26 May 2009 06:34:47 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/haleys-journal-a-whole-lot-of-random-thoughts-and-outbursts-t732.htm#5576 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/haleys-journal-a-whole-lot-of-random-thoughts-and-outbursts-t732.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/woppow-t758.htm woppow I thought I would give this a go. As I cant sleep yet again!! okkkk Hmmm, well, I am in a shit head space. i am not even ok. I am just alive. I am breathing. However I feel emptiness, bleakness, anguish, pain, misery and just generally lost(iness?). Its taken me about half an hour just to get that down. ok, but something good about my day. My bag of crap got shipped. and I should be getting it Tuesday or Wednesday. I got takeaways for tea although I hardly ... My Journal Fri, 29 May 2009 18:14:04 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/woppow-t758.htm#5704 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/woppow-t758.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/wizza-s-weird-wonderful-world-t831.htm _wizza_ I've been racking my brain for the past few weeks wonderin why things are looking up for me, i then just chose to accept and embrase my new found happiness and enjoy each day as it comes. i guess the turning point for me, started at the end of last year with my suicide attempts & a mix of the new meds which have been agreeing with me thus far. I done alot of soul searching-if thats what its called??- what makes me tick?? what gets me down & how can i change it?? after hitting an ... My Journal Wed, 17 Jun 2009 12:08:59 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/wizza-s-weird-wonderful-world-t831.htm#6718 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/wizza-s-weird-wonderful-world-t831.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/lc-thoughts-of-the-mind-t722.htm logical-cents Sometimes I wonder, and think that there must really be something wrong with me. I mean for one thing I'm on holiday yet here I am going into work yesterday for the day and then telling them I'll work Sunday as well. My holidays don't end till I go back to work on Tuesday. Got asked by so many people yesterday why I'd go into work while still on holiday, well what could I say? All I could tell them was that I was bored at home and needed something to do. But truth is the rest I couldn't tell ... My Journal Sat, 23 May 2009 01:17:17 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/lc-thoughts-of-the-mind-t722.htm#5452 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/lc-thoughts-of-the-mind-t722.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/ok-so-this-is-me-t1206.htm goquikchic Im new to this website, and so wish that I had found it long ago! I am a mother of 2 beautiful daughters, and even since the birth of my first, I have been battling depression. I have been on "happy pills" (as my Aunty calls them) on and off for the past 6 years, and have my good days and my bad days. My life has recently been tipped on its head with my husband and I taking the girls and moving to Perth, life is lonely as nothing is familiar around here, you dont ever see ... My Journal Fri, 06 Nov 2009 04:38:48 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/ok-so-this-is-me-t1206.htm#10929 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/ok-so-this-is-me-t1206.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/life-experience-t1224.htm Angelique message deleted My Journal Wed, 11 Nov 2009 11:22:48 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/life-experience-t1224.htm#11088 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/life-experience-t1224.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/who-i-am-t813.htm peterpam In the last few days, I have thought just how healing a journal might be, so I have decided that I am going to take the plunge and write down just who I am, my journey in life. My only problem is, I just can't start from today, I need to go back, so is it ok with you guys if I do it here??. I have much to learn, but I also feel I can offer a huge amount of help to others, so writing this journal will not only be helpful to me and maybe give strenght to others that need it. I will start with I ... My Journal Sun, 14 Jun 2009 07:36:16 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/who-i-am-t813.htm#6390 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/who-i-am-t813.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/my-pnd-days-t1037.htm Floss I have been wanting to start a journal since I joined TBBD about 3 weeks ago, but each time I try I just dont know where to start so I keep putting it off. About 3 weeks ago I was diagnosed with post natal depression and put on meds. Looking back, I guess I started having it after my first son was born but it has gotten worse more recently after my second son. I have 2 boys, one just over 2 years old and the other is nearly 7 months old now. I guess the pressures of having 2 small children close ... My Journal Mon, 07 Sep 2009 02:41:25 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/my-pnd-days-t1037.htm#9280 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/my-pnd-days-t1037.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/it-started-to-years-ago-t1054.htm mumtothree Well i have read a few of the other journals in here and thought i would give it a go. I'm not sure where to start so i'm just going to sound it out for me and see if it helps me by writing it down. Here i am 26weeks pregnant with our little suprise present and this feeling of dread just came over me, the pregnacy was turning out like my first baby oh no not another difficult baby how am i going to cope, went to gp to get help he just fobe me off in a not helpful manner, this set me back ... My Journal Thu, 10 Sep 2009 09:06:47 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/it-started-to-years-ago-t1054.htm#9420 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/it-started-to-years-ago-t1054.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/michelle-s-journal-t1177.htm Dolphingurl This is a journal about me. How it all started. I was 18 when i was first diagnosed with Bi polar. I was put onto arpoax and epilim and a sleeping tablet too. I was on the meds for several years, I went off them cold turkey not long after i met hubby. It worked for a few years. Then i relapsed big time and ended up back on medication. This time i'm on citalopram and epilim. When i was 21 i was diagnosed with multiple personality disorder. That ended up being complete untruth. I ... My Journal Mon, 26 Oct 2009 05:08:11 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/michelle-s-journal-t1177.htm#10619 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/michelle-s-journal-t1177.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/wop-lizzie-s-daily-course-log-t927.htm woppow Hey all. I thought I would start up this topic. So I could keep a recorded and so that the others on here can wish they were me lol. Well Monday -Me meeting with the two tutors and talked about what I want out of the course Tuesday - First day. It was really quiet and noone knew what to say. But we played some Ice breaker games Wednesday - We pitched tents for 4 hours! and then played team building games. Thursday (today) - In the morning we did goal ... My Journal Thu, 30 Jul 2009 04:06:22 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/wop-lizzie-s-daily-course-log-t927.htm#8055 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/wop-lizzie-s-daily-course-log-t927.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/can-anybody-find-me-t1150.htm Bella I'd like to think there was a point in my life where I could go back to and say 'that was me', that is who I miss, and that is who I aspire to be again, but I can't, because I don't really know who I am. Where do you start in the search for yourself? As the song goes, lets start at the very beginning. The sun shone brightly on the day I was born, the sky was blue and a gentel breeze rustled the leaves of the great oaks outside the bedroom window. The gentle song of the birds was broken ... My Journal Sat, 17 Oct 2009 21:20:51 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/can-anybody-find-me-t1150.htm#10402 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/can-anybody-find-me-t1150.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/a-ramble-through-judy-s-mind-t995.htm Bluebird1 Today has been so good, this morning my son phoned from London and I got an update on how my clever little grandson is doing. He is ofcourse meeting all his milestones on time and has the cutest chuckle. Then I went to pick up the 3 year old TV I purchased through TM for a very reasonable price. The vendors are downsizing their home and have bought themselves a flash new skinny type TV, they were lovely people and made me feel so welcome amidst their packaged up goods and the removal people ... My Journal Thu, 27 Aug 2009 02:31:13 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/a-ramble-through-judy-s-mind-t995.htm#8804 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/a-ramble-through-judy-s-mind-t995.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/my-mind-is-muddled-t1075.htm Worried I don't know how i feel or what to think anymore..Its all so confusing and i can't stop crying.... It probably started a LONG time ago.. during my teens and now it has come to a head.. have never felt so muddled before.... I want to figure out how i feel..get back to being the strong, bubbly, confident woman of a few years ago.. not the blubbering mess of a person i am now. I want to enjoy life not just survive...it is passing me by year by year and i've gotten nowhere only created ... My Journal Thu, 17 Sep 2009 08:23:24 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/my-mind-is-muddled-t1075.htm#9639 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/my-mind-is-muddled-t1075.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/infa-just-random-thoughts-and-complaints-d-t1056.htm imnotfallingapart Well here i am, made it another day and am that much closer to finishing school! My enrolment form was sent off for my diploma in film-making course yesterday so (fingers crossed) i should be hearing from them soon. Did my English mock exam yesterday. i feel i did surprisingly well, and with only four exams to go and then one week of school before the holidays i am in a rather good frame of mind. i get the house to myself this weekend (YAY!) as the rest of the family is off to see grannie ... My Journal Thu, 10 Sep 2009 22:48:02 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/infa-just-random-thoughts-and-complaints-d-t1056.htm#9441 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/infa-just-random-thoughts-and-complaints-d-t1056.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/flip-im-having-a-great-day-t1046.htm OliviaHeartsMo WOW! i have to contain my exitement!!! Firstly this morning i went to see a lady for a new placement and i liked it so much im going to move in next week, she got an englisg accent but is like dark brown so i dont know where shes from she had 3 kids a 3 year old son, a 6 year old girl and a 17 year old girl and there house has 4 rooms but ill have my own bedroom,they not christian but open to anything they kinda believe in the whole karma thing,they have had over 40 other kids living with them ... My Journal Wed, 09 Sep 2009 01:06:04 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/flip-im-having-a-great-day-t1046.htm#9355 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/flip-im-having-a-great-day-t1046.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/the-girl-who-screamed-tiger-t1031.htm suems Here's a fable that came to me one sleepless night. It kind of sums up where I am at the moment. Please bear it in mind before you read anything else I may post here. “The Girl Who Screamed Tiger!” You remember the boy who cried Wolf? Well, he had a sister, who took over shepherding duties when her brother got eaten. She knew never to lie, but when she saw a tiger threatening the sheep, she screamed loudly and the villagers came running. Unfortunately for her, her scream scared ... My Journal Sat, 05 Sep 2009 20:29:29 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/the-girl-who-screamed-tiger-t1031.htm#9219 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/the-girl-who-screamed-tiger-t1031.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/is-it-bad-to-feel-help-less-t919.htm OliviaHeartsMo well i havnt really posted on here bout myself really but now sinc another depression fourm i used to go on is closing down i guess i have to turn to here... well atm i really dont know where i am,what im doing and why. death ison my mind continuiously has been for years but it just feels like a go day to day with fake feelings and no real emotion like i cant even tell my closest friends how i REALLy feel,last year i began to open up but now im just back to faking things even with people ... My Journal Sun, 26 Jul 2009 10:22:38 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/is-it-bad-to-feel-help-less-t919.htm#7975 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/is-it-bad-to-feel-help-less-t919.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/my-struggle-t904.htm angiebabe DAY.1. OK- here goes..... After a terrible start to the year of 09 with 9 weeks off work after being badly injured during my hysterectomy my life went down hill quickly---gained some weight--lost interest in life--irritible and constantly grumpy--tired--not sleeping well--generally being a bitch--it all came to a head --which is when I bascially broke down (lost it) felt suicidal and was a MESS!!. This was only March 09=====So OFF to the Doctor, and on to anti-d's and then many ... My Journal Tue, 21 Jul 2009 21:21:51 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/my-struggle-t904.htm#7821 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/my-struggle-t904.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/poetry-t725.htm Anonymous Tick Tock

Oh hurry up and tick your tock
the minutes the hours
HURRY UP
tick your tock!
speed them up
ticktockticktocktick
TOCK!]]> My Journal Sat, 23 May 2009 04:17:53 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/poetry-t725.htm#5464 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/poetry-t725.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/-t734.htm _wizza_ Im not to sure of these journal things but i will give it a go. ive spend the last few days in bed with a nasty flu so my brain is in over-drive. Last night was horrible,the reason may sound silly to others, my cat Evo spent the night at the vet after having a cut on his paw infect. It got me thinking about how much this bundle of fur has saved me from going insane. I first got Evo whist living with my boyfriend "Mr. T", who worked from 5-5 leaving me on my own,no car,nowhere ... My Journal Tue, 26 May 2009 13:49:25 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/-t734.htm#5586 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/-t734.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/your-journals-t715.htm Admin (Paddy2) At the suggestion of our very own Jaffakiwi, TBBD now offers you the chance to have your own Journal Threads. Here's how JK says it can work: "Anybody who wants to keep a journal just creates a thread in this forum, and whenever they wanna update it and let others know how they are doing they post to their thread." Sounds simple enough, dunnit? Have fun. Pat. P.S. Thanks, JK. My Journal Wed, 20 May 2009 15:34:43 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/your-journals-t715.htm#5350 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/your-journals-t715.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/clear-as-mud-by-claire_sky-t728.htm claire_sky An oldie but a goodie … I can see clearly now, the rain is gone, I can see all obstacles in my way Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright) Sun-Shiny day. It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright) Sun-Shiny day. Yeah right. (Tui ad?) My name is Claire sky, or Claire Eyes as my druggy “friends” affectionately call me. I wish I could see the clear sky with out obstacles and dark clouds, I wish I didn’t need clear ... My Journal Mon, 25 May 2009 02:56:23 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/clear-as-mud-by-claire_sky-t728.htm#5558 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/my-journal-f9/clear-as-mud-by-claire_sky-t728.htm