http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/-t1.htm Sun, 15 Nov 2009 07:37:02 GMT 10 http://illiweb.com/fa/prosilver/site_logo.gif http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/-t1.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/no-title-warning-may-contain-or-mention-trigger-stuff-t1239.htm Paddy2 I found this a few days ago, amongst some 'Sunnyside Days' writing I feared was lost. The old bastard has been dead for a few years now, but feck, this particular episode still feels a bit raw, By Golly. Perhaps I should stop picking it to bits in my brain, sigh. Things folk stay can stick in the head sometimes - give me sticks and stones, any bloody day. THANKS, DAD: 6 March 1998 I saw my dad two days ago For the first time in a year He is 75 years old Ex WWII ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Sun, 15 Nov 2009 07:37:02 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/no-title-warning-may-contain-or-mention-trigger-stuff-t1239.htm#11194 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/no-title-warning-may-contain-or-mention-trigger-stuff-t1239.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/colour-of-depression-t1234.htm Angelique Lonliness and depression are the same colour as physcial hurt, a bruise............. BLACK AND BLUE In Our Own Words - writing to survive Fri, 13 Nov 2009 18:37:04 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/colour-of-depression-t1234.htm#11165 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/colour-of-depression-t1234.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/story-an-unforgivable-fate-t1122.htm Anonymous An unforgivable fate... The rain pelted down the side of the house while she stared outside the window, longing for her husband to arrive. Ten minutes he promised her, ten minutes then he would be safe and sound with her. Her heart thumping, in sync with the pitter patter of the rain hitting the roof. Her thoughts racing, yet she did not have a clear mind. It was two years ago, on a night like this, that she lost her only daughter, Gemma to the weather. Her mind constantly recalled ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 07 Oct 2009 07:24:43 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/story-an-unforgivable-fate-t1122.htm#10151 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/story-an-unforgivable-fate-t1122.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/raindrops-on-the-window-t895.htm logical-cents Like teardrops rolling down her cheeks She sits in a chair and watches The raindrops rolling down the window The dark black clouds in the sky Match the mood she is feeling that day Dark and grey, grim and sad She wonders when it will end This mood she hates so much For unlike the weather it has no forecast She stumbles through each day Days that are all rolled into one Where a day starts and ends that she is not sure. She sits and she wonders how She watches ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Fri, 17 Jul 2009 09:33:51 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/raindrops-on-the-window-t895.htm#7736 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/raindrops-on-the-window-t895.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/-t655.htm Anonymous im on my knees now my hands are bloody my head is bowed the tears they just dont stop i wont beg anymore even though ive no shame left no, i wont ask for anything cause all you give is pain and im all full up but, with what is left in me il pick up my chin and spit my broken teeth at you even if im on my last breath il curse you you might win, but youll never take me alive.... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Thu, 30 Apr 2009 09:32:03 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/-t655.htm#4662 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/-t655.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/my-pain-filled-logic-t359.htm 1teaspoon My Pain filled logic Logical equals irrational when one slices skin, an insane way of ridding, the pain from within. As bloody red tears flowed down my arm, I couldn’t see sense; that I was doing myself harm. It made sense at the time and felt like it helped, but I realize now, I was kidding myself. I felt that I had no other way of release, and by slicing my skin, I felt the pain inside ease. So if it helped out so much; then why did I hide? And not tell a soul; was it my ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Sat, 27 Dec 2008 00:10:49 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/my-pain-filled-logic-t359.htm#2450 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/my-pain-filled-logic-t359.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/another-day-t1057.htm imnotfallingapart I hang up the phone. I notice my hands are shaking. I can feel the heaviness in my chest and i know that i have to do something. fast. I'll have a shower. it's a place no-one else can see me, no one else can stare, no one else can ask if im ok. i can be alone. it will give me something to do, a distraction, a change. so what if i have already showered twice today? i flick on the radio. it isn't loud enough. i can still hear myself think. i need to drown out my own thoughts. louder. louder. ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Thu, 10 Sep 2009 23:30:00 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/another-day-t1057.htm#9445 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/another-day-t1057.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/me-myself-and-me-t994.htm raggamuffin I always thought my life was mine I always thought i was just me I always thought that was just the way i am How long has this been me Who is this me Where is me the real me The deep down inside of me Is there two of me So many questions inside A river raging Waves crashing Turmoil a storm within Darkness black Dead as night No life within Where is the hope The will the need Where is the sunshine In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 26 Aug 2009 13:41:47 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/me-myself-and-me-t994.htm#8797 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/me-myself-and-me-t994.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/silly-stuff-t89.htm Paddy2 Just to lighten things up a bit, I thought I'd post a short story I wrote for my daughter. I hope she doesn't mind me sharing it. Background: I used to live in the Hutt Valley. I can't cook. How the Chicken got its Name. Once upon a time, in a small country settlement, where the local War Memorial records more names than there is now people living there, existed a little, old and wizened, nomadic man, called, um, lets say, ‘Pat’. One day, Pat, whose tumbledown cottage was ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Fri, 03 Oct 2008 23:21:31 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/silly-stuff-t89.htm#664 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/silly-stuff-t89.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/s-i-l-e-n-c-e-t248.htm greasemonkey when I speak outwardly
it is a lessor rendition of what I feel,
as I say,'I love you'.

Between us,
as between all ppl that choose the heart as Their-Way
air becomes enlivened with presence.

In this same presence,
we truely know each-others heart,
choosing to attend the others needs with-out question.]]> In Our Own Words - writing to survive Mon, 24 Nov 2008 13:06:34 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/s-i-l-e-n-c-e-t248.htm#1650 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/s-i-l-e-n-c-e-t248.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/blindside-t955.htm labyrinth This is the blindside. I feel shattered, betrayed and bewildered. I am angry, hurt and scared. Why me. Why again. You make me feel so small. You take away my breath and blur my vision. I feel you in my bones. You rule my thoughts and cloud my world in black. I feel despair. And fatigue. The anorexia wears away my body while darkness fills my head. I dont know what to do any more. For 15 years I held you off and now here you are. You've been here for months, I just didnt see. And now its ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Sun, 16 Aug 2009 13:56:29 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/blindside-t955.htm#8351 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/blindside-t955.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/sometimes-the-t950.htm mylife world just sucks. You try and do something nice or think of something nice for some one and they just throw it back. The world can go and take a flying leap. Forget the whole thing. Lets just forget life, completely. I hate my life,I hate my life,I hate my life, I will never be good enough and never have been, and I DO NOT want to live my life. In Our Own Words - writing to survive Thu, 13 Aug 2009 10:53:18 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/sometimes-the-t950.htm#8307 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/sometimes-the-t950.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-worldlife-t944.htm Anonymous I don't know about you but I know life is an amazing thing, and how we evolved into humans, and what we have created with the resources the world has given us is incredible! We are such a dangerous species, but it is beyond amazing how we have become. How there are so many languages in this world- this one little world. Photos- capturing a moment in time that could have otherwise been forgotten, been lost forever.. It's so magical if you think about it! (well in my eyes it is). The internet, ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Sat, 08 Aug 2009 23:00:57 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-worldlife-t944.htm#8245 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-worldlife-t944.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/this-is-my-story-dads-anurysm-t605.htm _wizza_ it was March 25 2007, it was a sunday,at about 9am i had half woken up and heard my dad talking on the phone i heard him say "no worries ill jump in the showa and then ill come give ya a hand pete" i drifted back to sleep. i woke 10 minutes later to alot of noise i yelled out from my bed"whats goin on" mum,in the kitchen yelled back "its your father" by then i had jumped out of ran to the kitchen and keeped repeating whats wrong with him. by that point mum was ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 15 Apr 2009 17:24:58 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/this-is-my-story-dads-anurysm-t605.htm#4246 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/this-is-my-story-dads-anurysm-t605.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-ve-never-done-this-before-t603.htm Anonymous But I am going to think before I speak..so here goes, As I shut my eyes and type, my mind asks what depression means to me: Depressoin means sadness to me, no will to live. A big black cloud with no sun rays. Cold so cold. People want to help, but don't know how to. Depression is scary..what will I do? How will I do it. No talk with my depression. Just shouting and sarcasism. what brought this on? Was it my brothers interferring ways? was it the feeling of not being ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 15 Apr 2009 09:32:51 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-ve-never-done-this-before-t603.htm#4238 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-ve-never-done-this-before-t603.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/redundant-t777.htm Guerrilla Roach With easy distain
You lose while others don't

The reason made clear
Producing new fear
In this move I don't get a vote

Uncertain my future
The verbal computer
Is merciless in her approach

The recession is biting
But I'll keep on fighting
My future I must keep afloat]]> In Our Own Words - writing to survive Thu, 04 Jun 2009 21:35:37 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/redundant-t777.htm#5930 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/redundant-t777.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-loneliness-t162.htm Lonely Girl always has
probably always will

Lost and lonely girl inside
Hidding away
The locks tight on her heart

wishing for a different life
wishing for a love that will never be found
wishing the loneliness was over

Sometimes wondering how long the fight will go on
wondering why the pain is always there
will it ever stop?]]> In Our Own Words - writing to survive Fri, 31 Oct 2008 04:55:46 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-loneliness-t162.htm#1029 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-loneliness-t162.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/bloody-hell-t496.htm Paddy2 I entered a 'poem' I posted here, in a local Library writing competition a few months back. I got an email today; I hope you don't object to my skiting? "Hi – I am really pleased to tell you that you have won the “General entry” category of our competition with your entry “The passing”. The prize is $200 worth of book vouchers, which we would like to hand over as soon as we can organize a time to get our judge, the student entry winner and you together at the same time. I will ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Thu, 05 Mar 2009 06:18:58 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/bloody-hell-t496.htm#3544 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/bloody-hell-t496.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/happy-t463.htm Guerrilla Roach My mind begins to listen
In me it flows, it's me who knows
My heart begins to quicken

It's new you know
This place I sowed
I found the seeds inside

It'll soon take hold
I'll be so bold
I feel it grow in light]]> In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 11 Feb 2009 02:49:01 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/happy-t463.htm#3241 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/happy-t463.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/a-few-of-the-things-i-ve-written-over-the-years-t577.htm logical-cents Found these while tidying up some files on my computer. They're things I've written over the past few years. Have others as well, but thought I might share a few of them. All Alone All alone, Day becomes night, Night becomes day, But it’s just me all alone. Small dark room, Walls closing in, No room to move, Breathe or stretch. Walls get closer, As the room becomes darker, Suffocating around me, Bang, The gun in my hand goes off. In Our Own Words - writing to survive Thu, 09 Apr 2009 23:22:58 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/a-few-of-the-things-i-ve-written-over-the-years-t577.htm#4052 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/a-few-of-the-things-i-ve-written-over-the-years-t577.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/some-poems-iv-wrote-mostly-about-how-i-feel-n-all-that-each-to-their-own-to-be-interpretd-t902.htm OliviaHeartsMo BROKEN LOVE Broken upon the heart of love Destined to be Life-less in a world of the living Broken and afraid of the love that enters her surrounding Inflicting love upon her heart Greeting her mind it controls her Leaving scars of the blood that sheds Full of broken love Love that falls like tear drops upon her body Skin soaking love that devours Wanting to be reached But lost upon the many Lost in the found A never ending beginning -just a random poem i ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Tue, 21 Jul 2009 03:52:10 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/some-poems-iv-wrote-mostly-about-how-i-feel-n-all-that-each-to-their-own-to-be-interpretd-t902.htm#7813 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/some-poems-iv-wrote-mostly-about-how-i-feel-n-all-that-each-to-their-own-to-be-interpretd-t902.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/tired-t679.htm Anonymous I have the panic attacks under control for now, thank you to all for your help. Now i am just tired. Low... I guess even with all these meds you can still be depressed. I had an appointment in town - posted some parcels, and waited 40 minutes...had made arrangements to meet a family member. During that time a psych nurse approached spoke to me...two other people spoke to me...... It all just went over my head so to speak. Realising i had waited for so long and security were beginning ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 06 May 2009 00:01:22 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/tired-t679.htm#4875 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/tired-t679.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/a-poem-for-my-partner-t893.htm Anonymous You’ve done so much, For me, That’s true, Even when I have no clue. You’re only human, I understand, My life with you, I tried to can. But now I see, How much you care, A life without me, You say, You cannot bear. The hope you have, For me, to be free, I want you to know that you’re the key. The key to my happiness, The key to my heart, I love you so much, We cannot part. I know I do hurt you, I can be mean, But you haven’t given up, You ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Thu, 16 Jul 2009 22:19:01 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/a-poem-for-my-partner-t893.htm#7724 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/a-poem-for-my-partner-t893.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/life-t851.htm Anonymous "Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass... it's about learning how to survive them." For all that read the first posting oops pushed delete....... storms off to Vent In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 24 Jun 2009 11:52:18 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/life-t851.htm#7090 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/life-t851.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/getting-older-t770.htm greasemonkey Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old,of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more: 1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good. 2. When in doubt, just take the next small step. 3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. 4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Mon, 01 Jun 2009 05:01:37 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/getting-older-t770.htm#5815 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/getting-older-t770.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-don-t-understand-t139.htm Folly edited In Our Own Words - writing to survive Fri, 24 Oct 2008 06:38:48 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-don-t-understand-t139.htm#937 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-don-t-understand-t139.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/poem-i-received-t727.htm Anonymous A good friend sent me this poem in the email. I was surprised when he told me that he wrote it himself, specifically for me. Anyway thought you all might like it too. Hollow man, Hollow man, Feels so alone. Hollow man, Hollow man, Feels out of the zone. Hollow man, Hollow man, Wants to moan. 'Cause teardrop aisles In their big piles Drags him down For miles. Make him scream Hear the queens Bellar through their trumpets. Make ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Sat, 23 May 2009 13:02:49 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/poem-i-received-t727.htm#5497 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/poem-i-received-t727.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-think-i-cani-sorta-know-i-can-t698.htm Anonymous I think i can...i think i can.....I know I can!!!!! Said the little train 'whats his name' Well today is the big adventure outdoors......please...... please..... This will most probably come across as pathetic but i have that wee chant going this morning as i am leaving the house. I've got a concert to go to, I am suppose to be in the band but haven't been able to leave the house for practice sessions....but am determined to support the cause. Not only that but get some needed groceries ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Tue, 12 May 2009 20:39:19 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-think-i-cani-sorta-know-i-can-t698.htm#5042 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-think-i-cani-sorta-know-i-can-t698.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/an-old-but-true-saying-t453.htm Me But when I'm for myself alone, what am I?
And if not now, when?]]> In Our Own Words - writing to survive Fri, 06 Feb 2009 14:12:30 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/an-old-but-true-saying-t453.htm#3130 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/an-old-but-true-saying-t453.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/just-me-i-want-to-live-t452.htm sad princess bye bye]]> In Our Own Words - writing to survive Fri, 06 Feb 2009 08:47:23 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/just-me-i-want-to-live-t452.htm#3128 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/just-me-i-want-to-live-t452.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/stigma-just-me-venting-really-t157.htm Angel Stigma Before my diagnosis I would have been taken seriously Now I know that you roll your eyes When you find that I’m depressingly morbid I’m seen as crazy A basket case But I’m not I am who I always was Before When I was just me Not this thing Now I realize It’s not about who you are But what you are What’s the point in trying? You’ve already vanquished me To the mortuary cold chambers Stigma attached to me Like a morgue tag on my toe Identifying ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 29 Oct 2008 00:15:16 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/stigma-just-me-venting-really-t157.htm#1008 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/stigma-just-me-venting-really-t157.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/siren-of-the-desert-t406.htm Daecon Siren of the Desert Calling out to me Queen of desolation Spirit set me free... I saw her standing in the desert Starlight gleaming in her eyes Sandstorm patterns swirling ’round her Rhythmic magic hypnotise Entrance my soul, I feel I’m flying With her drifting by my side An ocean of dust a mile below me My head thrown back, my arms stretched wide This girl beside me, is she real? With ebony hair and emerald eyes Skin so pale in shining moonlight Whatever ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Mon, 12 Jan 2009 09:21:50 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/siren-of-the-desert-t406.htm#2781 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/siren-of-the-desert-t406.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/just-2-say-hi-is-all-t383.htm dyslexick-man-lol <<<<<<that one is cool <<<and that 1 ]]> In Our Own Words - writing to survive Thu, 08 Jan 2009 04:44:34 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/just-2-say-hi-is-all-t383.htm#2643 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/just-2-say-hi-is-all-t383.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/others-and-me-t304.htm Guerrilla Roach A label fell upon my head It came from a man professionally said He raised his head from notes he writ The gabble fell the sentence fit I bounced through youth scarcely aware People told barely contained their fear Awkward and different and found wholly deficient As strangers began to stare But I could not keep this conviction It fits only symptoms What of me lost forgotten inside The strength of forgiveness Understood the headiness I could no longer run and ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Mon, 08 Dec 2008 00:19:31 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/others-and-me-t304.htm#2062 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/others-and-me-t304.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/reactions-t345.htm lowdown To think
To move
To react

Gets a sharp word
A rebuke
A grumble

Makes me feel
Small
Silly
Childlike

In the way
Not much use
Dead weight
Dead wood

Wish I could be
Quick and light
Fast and snappy
A thinking player

But too tired
Too sad
Too worn out
To even care]]> In Our Own Words - writing to survive Tue, 23 Dec 2008 08:13:49 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/reactions-t345.htm#2360 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/reactions-t345.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/poem-death-wish-warninng-may-trigger-thoughts-t348.htm Bluezero I wrote this poem when I was feeling really low... I used to write alot of poetry but now I have writer's block. Death Wish Black despondency So wicked, so sinful so spiteful Side tracked with my pestilential self I am a deleterious destructive machine Who breaks down all the time, so dangerous, living on edge Rejected a thousand times, shunned, backed away in my dark violent corner My devious eyes are so shallow, hollow and bare Diabolism is embedded in my mind, full ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 24 Dec 2008 06:33:37 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/poem-death-wish-warninng-may-trigger-thoughts-t348.htm#2382 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/poem-death-wish-warninng-may-trigger-thoughts-t348.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/brands-t330.htm Guerrilla Roach Badly branded, by slippery rabbits, that hopped all through my head. At least that's how I saw it, as often as poor kids, can sleep without making the bed. For mine has been awful, a sadly drawn borstal, a warden would lock my door. To keep me from running, from miserable violence, that beat nasty sounds on my wall. My heart pounds through seconds, as a psycho's intentions, come looking for boy under bed. But hidden well has it been, the emotion that I've seen, it's bottled now ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Thu, 18 Dec 2008 01:48:03 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/brands-t330.htm#2285 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/brands-t330.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-ending-t307.htm Southernbelle ANGRY FRUSTRATED
CONFUSED UPSET DISSAPPOINTED
EXHAUSTED HUNGRY
LONELY]]> In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 10 Dec 2008 04:49:38 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-ending-t307.htm#2082 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-ending-t307.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/expectations-t306.htm lowdown Brought up to be Dependable be Reliable be Unflappable be Responsible be unshakeable be accountable be answerable Fix the unfixable Achieve the impossible But its too hard Being superwoman But When I stop they will be horrified be disappointed be angry be lost be scared be annoyed But I'd just like to be Me. In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 10 Dec 2008 04:07:58 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/expectations-t306.htm#2081 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/expectations-t306.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/rambling-again-t305.htm ZenMonsta I sit alone on a platform Waiting for the train to hell I see its smoke in the distance slowly weaving a chill around my soul as it snakes along the tracks I hold a ticket in my hand A piece of paper on which a fate is written It pulses in time with my blood We are linked The train The ticket I I hear the chug chug inching ever closer I feel the ground beneath me move The train is On time.....In time with my life I smell the steam it spews as it pulls ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Tue, 09 Dec 2008 00:39:24 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/rambling-again-t305.htm#2072 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/rambling-again-t305.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/over-the-next-wee-while-t76.htm Paddy2 I'm going to add stuff I wrote in my battle to get by, a year or so back when things were particularly grim. Most of it is in the form of 'poetry' for want of a better term. No one except my ACC-funded counsellor has read these. I'm pretty scared about the prospect of sharing my demons like this, but hopefully, there may be something in what I've felt and written, that lets you know you're not alone in feeling the way you do. You are welcome to add your own writing, thoughts, fears, ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Sun, 28 Sep 2008 09:38:01 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/over-the-next-wee-while-t76.htm#570 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/over-the-next-wee-while-t76.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/letter-to-my-inner-child-t207.htm Angel This is what I wrote to my inner child: Little Angel, You are beautiful my darling You didn't deserve to go through this pain The torture you endured It wasn't your fault And you don't need to hide away From this world anymore I'm sorry I hurt you by telling our secret But it was the best thing to do We need to heal And holding onto it Will only hurt us more The only way we'll ever fly again Is ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Wed, 12 Nov 2008 21:18:55 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/letter-to-my-inner-child-t207.htm#1309 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/letter-to-my-inner-child-t207.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-am-an-odd-person-lol-t210.htm lifeshouldbegreat When I feel sad or down,I listen to songs and write down lyrics of songs that explain exactly how I feel at that moment or songs that inspire me.I go through the song slowly,pausing and typing up the lyrics(sometimes I cant figure out what some say) and just wanted to share some lyrics I have recently typed,I will add more as time goes on,boring I know Extract from evernesance song Now I will tell you what Ive done for you 50 thousands tears Ive cried Screaming,decieving and bleeding ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Thu, 13 Nov 2008 07:57:56 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-am-an-odd-person-lol-t210.htm#1339 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/i-am-an-odd-person-lol-t210.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/drop-in-centres-t212.htm aaajirah ]]> In Our Own Words - writing to survive Thu, 13 Nov 2008 10:23:11 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/drop-in-centres-t212.htm#1343 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/drop-in-centres-t212.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-circle-of-life-t181.htm lifeshouldbegreat OK I suck at writing,Im not a good poet but I have written something(dont know if it could pass as a poem)but first I'd like to explain it.On the 26th October our baby girl was born,the same day hubbys grandmother died,a friend of mine has just given birth to a sleeping baby,my mum and her sisters are stressed and fighting as my grandmother is in hospital and things arent looking good.My husband lost his grandmother but stayed strong for me,his mother,his brother,his sister,his grandfather and ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Tue, 04 Nov 2008 06:21:20 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-circle-of-life-t181.htm#1115 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/the-circle-of-life-t181.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/a-couple-of-poems-t169.htm 1teaspoon OLD FAMILIAR FEELING. This old familiar feeling, washes back to shore, I just can’t stop it happening, I feel there is no cure. Standing on the shoreline, watching life sail by, I want to paddle out to sea and wave this life goodbye. I see you standing near me, you speak, I cannot hear, I feel im in a sea fog, your words they are not clear. You wrap your thoughts around me, as if to stem the tide, Yet you do not see me struggling, though your eyes are open wide. I ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Sun, 02 Nov 2008 00:11:49 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/a-couple-of-poems-t169.htm#1053 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/a-couple-of-poems-t169.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/some-of-our-writings-t77.htm Chatzs et al ok heres some of ours. All I need All I need is a hug Just a little one All I need is to be told it's going to be ok All I need is a shoulder to cry on without a word of complaint All I need is someone to understand Are my needs too much Are my needs deserved Time will tell Innocence Lost A little girl sits in a corner her eyes filling up despertatly she wipes her eyes and hopes that she is not seen Footsteps ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Sun, 28 Sep 2008 10:06:06 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/some-of-our-writings-t77.htm#576 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/some-of-our-writings-t77.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/writing-about-hospital-t131.htm Folly I was put in a room with grey blinds on the inside windows and fluroescent lights. The chairs were plastic deck chairs..too light to do damage when chucked around. There were several people in the room with me, I don't think I knew any of them. A tall balding man with glasses came in, I hated him straight away. They asked me question after question I didn't say much, just sat there chewing on my hand, voices roaring in my head. The lights were hurting my eyes and I wanted to sleep, ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Tue, 21 Oct 2008 00:50:19 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/writing-about-hospital-t131.htm#866 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/writing-about-hospital-t131.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/another-poem-titled-prey-t130.htm Angel Prey On a park bench Sitting amongst my pain Each agonizing breath Blames your hands, your touch Your perverted behavior Tainted blood runs through my veins Venom from a snake With no remorse Slithering sinfully into my soul Cursing my existence You said that it was fine I was the one to warm you up Heating your cold blood As you felt me with your scaly body Making me shiver with disgust You make me sick You are a vile serpent Consuming innocence Like ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Tue, 21 Oct 2008 00:20:38 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/another-poem-titled-prey-t130.htm#859 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/another-poem-titled-prey-t130.htm http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/fragmented-mind-t122.htm Angel Fragmented Mind These restless nights I find no comfort From the hell that lies within And the pain that stabs my brain With shards of broken fragments I lie awake And all I hear Are echoes Mirroring themselves Forever reflecting Through the sharp edges Of a cracked mirror Inside my mentality I feel the pain in my body The anxiousness Angst From the hell that lies within The agony that stabs my heart With shards of glass Reflecting back at me A ... In Our Own Words - writing to survive Sat, 18 Oct 2008 23:15:57 GMT http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/fragmented-mind-t122.htm#822 http://thebigblackdog.forumotion.net/in-our-own-words-writing-to-survive-f5/fragmented-mind-t122.htm